Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Fall Can Bite Me!

The Fall Season has arrived with a bang. Actually its more like a blow. My goodness, is it not possible to talk about the seasons without innuendo?

What I am trying to say is that Fall has arrived in a serious way with a lot of wind and a lot of cold. Summer has disappeared like the fleeting fame of a reality TV star.

While I have a couple reasons for liking Fall, I mostly hate it. There are so many reasons to hate Fall. Especially if you live in the Midwest.

As I prepare to type the two things I like about fall, I realize that both reasons are pretty gay (not that there's anything wrong with that). The first is, of course, LAYERING. Nothing beats a jacket over a sweatshirt over a shirt over an undershirt. Am I right? The second thing that is sometimes appealing about fall is the cool colors on the trees.

At least those are the things that some gay people I know tell me is awesome about Fall. Now here are all the crappy things about it.

It is a lot of damn work. You have to winterize the pool. You have to winterize the spinklers. You have to winterize the house. You have to winterize the yard. You have to put all the outdoor crap away. Work work work work work.

Also, all the damn leaves falling all over everything is not appealing in the least bit. Especially when they all start dying and turning brown and ugly.

But the biggest thing that sucks about Fall is that Summer is over and Winter is coming. And oooooohhh do I HATE winter. Hate it with a passion. If I never saw snow again, I would be a happy man.

So Fall....Bite me! Stickman out!

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