Friday, August 28, 2009

Everything Must Go! Get It While It's Hot!

California is having its blow-out garage sale right now. Apparently by selling a few odds and ins such as old prison uniforms and a spare Xbox 360, the esteemed actor governor of California is convinced that he can wipe out the state's $25 billion deficit. That, my friends, is one hell of a garage sale.

Mrs. Stickman and I tried to do a garage sale once. The thing brought in a gross profit of around $25. Then after we paid the kids off for helping set it up, we brought in a net of about $3. And then we still ended taking a couple truckloads of crap to a charity. The most ridiculous thing about that whole garage sale, however, was the fact that the kids wanted the money for all the crap of theirs that we sold - apparently it didn't matter that I am the one that bought it all.

So anyway, I figure the state of California is screwed. Perhaps they can get a sponsor. You know how all of the sports arenas, and the college bowl games, and almost everything else you can think of has a sponsor now? They could be the Microsoft State of California. Or the Viacom State of California. Or something more saucy like Victoria's Secret State of California. Or we could make it real easy and have it be the Mexico State of California.

From what I understand, they are looking to increase the value of items by having the governor autograph them. I can not think of a better Halloween costume than a California State Penitentiary uniform autographed by Arnold Schwarzeneggar. And who wouldn't want The Terminator's signature on their car?

I wish I would have thought of offering to autograph the things at our garage sale. Who wouldn't want a Stickman autograph on their child's Abercrombie jeans? I bet we could have brought in at least $26 dollars if I would have thought of that.

What are they going to think of next in California? Sell all the stop signs? The traffic lights? Maybe they could sell all their illegal immigrants back to Mexico. That would be a good deal, especially since they would probably just come right back anyway. They could keep reselling the same immigrants.

I bet the top item at the garage sale is the big giant knife that Governor Schwarzenegger used in his famous garage salesman video. I bet they could get at least $100 for a giant buck. $150 if he signed it!

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1 comment:

  1. In Illinois we just sell Senate seats... California should try that.