Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Jack Bauer: Proof He Is Based On Me

It seems almost everybody knows who Jack Bauer is.  Even people that don't watch the totally awesome show, 24, know who he is.  I even saw a Jack Bauer for President t-shirt at Target one time.

As I watch 24, I become more and more convinced that they have based the character of Jack Bauer on some of my still classified history from the CIA.  It seems quite obvious to me.  Others not so much.  But that's just because I'm not authorized to tell them everything about me.  Duh!

So here are the top 5 reasons why I believe Jack Bauer is based on me:

1.  He's a badass.  The comparison here, I believe, is obvious.

2.  He always has a great idea.  Whenever I get in a pinch, or things aren't going right, I can always come up with an idea to move things along.

3.  He is good with technology.  I am awesome with technology.  There's not an electronic device out there that I can't figure out.

4.  He's good with a comeback.  The is one of the best things about Jack.  Once a suspect asked for a lawyer and Jack said, "I am your lawyer!"  This is also one of the best things about me.  I always have a comeback.  Once Mrs. Stickman asked for a banana, and I said, "I am your banana!"  See.

5.  He always saves the planet.  I recycle.

I think it should be clear to everyone now that the similarities are just too numerous to deny that Jack Bauer is based on my life.  But please don't tell anyone.  I don't want to get in trouble with the government for giving out too much classified information!

Speaking of 24... I have a little game that I like to play when we watch the show.  I see how many different ways I can say "jack off."  Here are some examples...
They'll never get Jack off the case.

Why don't they let Jack offer him immunity.

Jack often tortures his suspects.

Looks like they got Jack officially in trouble.

I think Jack offended that guy.
It's really great fun.  It's even more fun when Mrs. Stickman joins in, with winners like this one.
"Jack doesn't often mess up."  At least she knew it as soon as she said it!

In other news... I have been in the blogosphere for one whole month today!  It has gone by quick.  I'm still learning and trying to improve.  I haven't quite found my rhythm yet, but I think I may be getting there.  All I need now are some more people to read it!  So if you actually ARE reading this, pass along your favorite post to a friend.  Maybe we can make it not so lonely here.  Thanks!

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  1. Pfft that means I can be Jack Bauer!

    Because you asked so nicely, I shall put you on my blogroll and stumble you when I get home.

  2. Bee...You could be, but you aren't. I am! Thanks for the ad!

  3. I think you, Jack Bauer and MacGuyver are the same person.

  4. Self...Now we're talking. Thanks for recognizing that. Although, unfortunately it's probably more like McGruber. Seen that?