Thursday, March 26, 2009

Second Grade Girls Are The Devil

Is it wrong to want to physically harm a 2nd grade girl that you don't even know?  I'm sure it is, but I'm not sure if I care.  Because I am quite certain that this spawn of satan young child was placed in my path for the sole purpose of ruining my day.

Here's the deal.  For the last few days I have been carpooling to work with one of my coworkers.  This due to an unfortunate problem with my vehicle deciding it didn't like hauling my fat flat ass around any more.  So, the dude that I am driving with (who happens to be the one that is too lazy to win the lottery himself) picks me up at home, and then we go and drop his kids off at school on the way in to work.

Today, we are dropping his second grade son off in front of his school.  My chauffeur gets out to help his son out of the car.  When he gets back in, he is laughing.  So me, being extra curious this morning, ask him what's so funny.  And that is where my day went downhill.  If only I could take the question back.

What was soooo funny?  When he was helping his son with his backpack, this devil-child girl says to the son.... wait for it... "Is that your grandpa in the car?"  OMG! WTF?!

I begged him to pull over so that I could assist this demonic spirit child with the removal of her remaining baby teeth.  She needed to learn a valuable lesson in how young and hip I am.  Although, my anger began to turn when my coworker says, "Maybe it's time to get some Just For Men."  Now, granted, I have some gray hair... but I was wearing a hat!

Then it dawns on me.  I have this one sweatshirt that Mrs. Stickman insists makes me look like a grandpa.  And guess what I was wearing today?  But then again, I had that sweatshirt covered up with the jacket that gained me entrance into the Cool Coat Gang.  So, I don't know that the little poltergeist girl could have seen the sweatshirt.

It only got worse when I arrive at work, and the coworker insists on telling the entire office the story.  I am mortified.  And apparently old. 

I'm off to mope now.  Stickman out!

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  1. You were wearing a hat?? A baseball hat or one of those hats you see in movies like the godfather?

  2. was one of those giant foam cowboy hats.

  3. It's when you're asked if you need the senior discount at the diner that you're in real trouble.

  4. PHFL... I don't know what I'll do when that happens. I still don't like it if I don't get carded for alcohol!