Sunday, March 15, 2009

Smack Down The Kids

We recently got a wrestling game for the Wii called Smack Down. I absolutely love this game. It is a lot of fun, and I tell you, it's a great workout.

So yesterday I spent a bit of the day beating the crap out of my son. On the game, of course! I was having so much fun, that I'm pretty sure at one point I was giggling. I was able to keep doing this same move on him where I pick him up and then drop him on my leg, busting his balls. I was laughing, and he kept saying, "put me down...put me down." Apparently, to those that were elsewhere in the house, but could here us, it sounded quite funny.

The best thing about the game, though, is the fact that you can make your own characters that wrestle. I managed to make a character that looks exactly like me. It is kinda creepy how much it looks like me actually - right down to the clothes, the moobs, and the beer belly. And, of course, his name is Stickman.

So yesterday my son asks me to use my mad character making skills to make one of him. The details that the game lets you adjust are practically infinite. From eyebrow arch and bushiness, to the distance between the eyes, to muscle (or lack of) definition. So I am going through this whole process, as he sits in front of the TV as a comparison and model for me.

The best part, however, came when it was time for his clothes. I put a camouflage thong on him. He is a 15 year old, and he was not particularly impressed by my choice. But, oh my god, did I laugh. Mrs. Stickman even came down to watch and join in the laughing. He decided that I was gay because I put him in a thong. I pointed out, of course, that I was not the one wearing a thong to wrestle guys in. Good times!

The Wii is great fun to play. But it has led to a new injury diagnosis. Today I am suffering from Wii Shoulder. It's very similar to Tennis Elbow. But probably closer to Shuffleboard Shoulder. Quite a bit different from Darts Wrist, and no where near similar to Bowling Thumb.

These are all various injuries that I have actually been self-diagnosed and suffered from on several occasions. The worst, however, is Badminton Belly - which is the pain I get in my belly from laughing at how bad Mrs. Stickman and the girl child are at playing that game. I always take on both of them by myself and beat them like infiniti to two.

So, if you've ever dreamed of beating the crap out of your kids, definitely give Smack Down a try. As long as you are careful to avoid Wii Shoulder, you will most assuredly have a good time.
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